Tag: Divorce

There’s No Divorce Emoji

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

Emojis and emoticons are popping up in divorce cases, and people are landing in hot water. My new article on emojis and legal ambiguity, which was just published in the Florida Bar Family Law Section Commentator, can help anyone faced with interpreting emojis avoid feeling ????.

Emojis ????

Originating in Japan in 1998, emojis are small digital images used to express an idea or an emotion in electronic communications.

Today, roughly 70 percent of the public uses some type of social media.  Social media has changed many of the ways in which we communicate. For one thing, social media has increased our use of emojis.

One report found more than 92 percent of people use emojis on social media. Emojis have spread to the business world, where nearly half of workers add emojis to professional communications, and companies use them to increase sales and brand awareness.

Emojis in Court ????‍⚖️

They can’t simply be overlooked by courts, because emojis and emoticons say a lot about the sender’s intent. Ignoring them would be like calling a witness to the stand and ignoring their facial expressions.

Emojis fail the ‘duck test’: if it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it is probably a duck. That’s because emoji meanings can be so puzzling, a “duck” emoji, may mean anything but a duck.

For example, a U.S. federal court recently held that a “Smiley” emoticon =) converted an email into a joke, the email meant the opposite of what it said, and a criminal defendant’s lawyer did not violate the Sixth Amendment by sending the prosecutor an email joking: “stipulate that my client is guilty. :)”

An Israeli court awarded damages based on emojis after a prospective tenant sent a landlord a text saying: “Good morning ???? we want the house???????? ????‍ ✌ ☄ ???? ???? just need to go over the details. . .” The landlord removed his ad, then the tenant disappeared. The court awarded the landlord 8,000 shekels.

Ambiguity: What does ???? Mean?

I’ve written about marital settlement agreements and prenuptial agreements before. There are unique issues with emojis, rendering them hard to interpret. For one thing, there’s no definitive source as to what emojis mean.

That unknown can make agreements in an email, a text or an actual marital contract, ambiguous. Marital agreements are interpreted like any other contract. Basic interpretation begins with the plain language of the contract, because the contract language is the best evidence of intent.

Courts are not supposed to rewrite terms if they are clear and unambiguous. Anyone seeking to show a court any evidence outside a fully integrated contract, must first establish that a contract is ambiguous.

A contract is ambiguous when its language is reasonably susceptible to more than one interpretation. That’s where emojis come in, they can be very ambiguous. But why?

Emojis are also small, making them hard to read. Interpreting an emoji can depend on what kind of device they appear in. For example, a 24-inch computer monitor displays thing differently than a 4-inch phone screen.

Emojis don’t always mean the same thing universally, so there can be many different meanings depending on which country you are in. For example:

????

The “Folded Hands” emoji symbolize “please” and “thank you” in Asia. However, in the U.S. it means: “I’m praying,” and frequently, “high-five”!

????

The “Pile of Poo” emoji is a pun on the Japanese word for excrement (unko), which starts with the same “oon” sound as the word for “luck” and is complimentary in Japan. But, in the U.S. the emoji is used to express contempt. Strangely, Canadians use the emoji the most.

Conclusion

You can’t understand an emoji’s meaning just by looking at one. People use emojis in ways that have nothing to do with the physical objects they represent, or even what typographers intended. There are regional, cultural and slang meanings to consider too. After all, emojis’ inherent ambiguity is one reason why they’re increasingly becoming evidence in court.

The Spring 2018 Family Law Commentator is here.

 

Gray Divorce

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

It used to be unthinkable for couples to divorce after 50. Things have changed dramatically. These days more people over 50 are divorced than widowed. This age group now accounts for one-quarter of all divorces. This is a post about divorcing after age 50, otherwise known as the gray divorce.

Growing Apart: The New Trend

According to some reports, these so-called “gray divorces” have doubled since 1990 and, with half our married population being 50 or older, the rate is expected to grow, especially as more and more baby boomers become empty nesters.

Divorce is hard and complicated no matter what your age is. But divorce might be something to approach carefully if you’re over the age of 50. Here’s why.

Florida Gray Divorce

When couples choose to divorce in their 30s or 40s, they still have time to recover financially, because adults at that age have several years, if not decades, left in their careers.

But when divorce occurs when a couple is in their 50s or later, careers may either be coming to a close or are completed, and spouses are often living on fixed incomes provided through Social Security or retirement benefits.

I’ve written about this subject before. Here are some things to consider:

  • Valuing the Marital Estate – By the time a couple enters the golden years, they may have gold to divide, including businesses, retirement funds, and vacation homes. Valuing these assets can be difficult. The value of a business may not be apparent from balance sheets, and the sale or transfer of assets may have tax consequences. As a result, a financial advisor may be an important component in the divorce.
  • Medical Care – Health insurance is often tied to the employment of one spouse. With aging comes diminishing health, and declining cognitive ability. Courts may need to intervene if one party has dwindling capacity to handle their own affairs.
  • Long-Term Arrangements – Legal arrangements, such as wills and trusts, need to be reviewed to make sure they reflect post-divorce wishes. The same is true for long-term care, such as medical directives, living wills and trusts.
  • Retirement Plans – After 20 years of marriage, retirement plans can be substantial . . . and complex. Retirement plans vary in kind, and they all have different restrictions, tax consequences, distribution and vesting rules.
  • Lifestyle adjustment – Younger couples have time to re-accumulate wealth after divorce, but in Gray Divorces, the spouses have less time to re-establish themselves financially. One or both may be close to or in retirement, and face living on half of what they earmarked for retirement.

Why is it happening?

There are many explanations for the gray divorce phenomenon. Often, couples aren’t on the same timeline emotionally when it comes to divorcing, and that can make a gray divorce particularly painful.

People are surprised to be dealing with a spouse who wants out after many years of marriage. The “leavee” can’t imagine growing old alone. The “leaver”, may feel guilty for ending the marriage.

Two-thirds of gray divorces are initiated by women. Having put their needs aside to raise a family, and tired of a spouse who ignores their pleas for change, these women dread the years ahead in a “dead” marriage.

Once the kids are gone, these women choose to end the marriage, opting for a new, more rewarding life and relationships.

The Tweet on Gray Marriage is here.

 

Family Law is Moving!

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

We’re pleased to announce that, beginning Monday, May 7, 2018, one of Florida’s premier marital and family law firms, the Law Offices of Ronald H. Kauffman, P.A., will be starting the workday in our new offices at One Biscayne Tower.

One Biscayne Tower

That’s right, we’re moving around the corner, across the street from Bayfront Park and Biscayne Bay. The new office building is named One Biscayne Tower and the address is:

2 South Biscayne Boulevard

Suite 3400

Miami, FL 33131

One Biscayne Tower is an iconic skyscraper on Biscayne Boulevard across from Bayfront Park. It comprises “Class A” office space and has been a long-standing symbol of the City of Miami.

The building often appears on postcards of the Miami skyline and is a signature building of Miami. Our new offices provide sweeping views of beautiful Biscayne Bay, the park, and bustling downtown Miami.

One Biscayne Tower has won five Office Building of the Year (TOBY) Awards, including the 2007 Miami-Dade TOBY Award and the 2007 BOMA Southern Regional TOBY.

Ronald H. Kauffman, P.A

Specializing in all family law matters both domestically and abroad, our lawyers are experienced in sophisticated marital and family law cases and led by a lawyer who is board-certified in marital and family law by the Florida Bar Board of Legal Specialization and Education.

A “Super Lawyer”, accomplished writer and speaker, Executive Council of the Florida Bar’s Family Law Section, our attorneys and firm have been professionally admired for serving our clients with the utmost skill, discretion and confidentiality in divorces, alimony, child custody and relocation cases, as well as prenuptial and postnuptial agreements.

Our firm website is here.

 

Property Division is Not Half Bad

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

They say a guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car. A Kansas man is showing the reverse is also true. Alternatively, that would explain why the Kansas man still clings to his half-of-a-car long after his love ended. At the very least,his half-a-car is physical proof that a property division means equal halves.

The Better Half

According to the Kansas City Star, the late-Edgerton Mayor, Ray Braun, used to own the gas station where the front half of his 1987 Chevrolet Citation is parked, a testament to a successful property division.

On the side of the car is a sign which reads:

“Divorced. She got ½.”

The former mayor is the culprit who put his half of the equitable distribution – the half-car – in front of the gas station.

Some view his half a car as a landmark. If you go to Kansas City, or anywhere around, and ask about this town, they have no clue where it’s at. But if you ask them, ‘You remember that little half-car that’s off 56?’ ‘Yeah!’ ‘Well, that’s that little town.

But at a special morning meeting, the three council members in attendance decided unanimously for the city attorney to draft a resolution to finally be rid of the half car.

Florida Property Division

I’ve written about property division in Florida many times before. Property division, or equitable distribution as it is called in Florida, is governed by statute and case law.

Generally, courts set apart to each spouse their nonmarital assets and debts, and then distribute the marital assets and debts between the parties. In dividing the marital assets and debts though, the court must begin with the premise that the distribution should be equal.

However, if there is a justification for an unequal distribution, the court can give less than equal.

When a court orders an unequal distribution, it must base the decision on certain factors, including some of the following:

  • The contribution to the marriage by each spouse.
  • The economic circumstances of the parties.
  • The duration of the marriage.
  • Any interruption of personal careers or educational opportunities.
  • The contribution to the personal career or educational opportunity of the other spouse.
  • The desirability of retaining any asset.
  • The intentional dissipation, waste, depletion, or destruction of marital assets after the filing of the petition or within 2 years prior to the filing of the petition.
  • Any other factors necessary to do equity and justice between the parties.

The courts don’t even have to wait for the end of the case to distribute property. Florida law allows courts, if they find good cause that there should be an interim partial distribution during a divorce action, to equitably distribute property sooner.

You Don’t Know the Half of It

Braun fitted his half-car with rear caster wheels and used to drive it in parades. But City Council President Clay Longanecker says the car has become “an eyesore” and the Edgerton codes department has ruled it has to be disposed of.

To some Edgerton residents however, the half-car has for years been seen as a welcoming post, a kind of unofficial eyesore monument. and some may fight to keep it.

The biggest joke of all? Braun was never divorced.

The Kansas City Star article is here.

 

Avoid the American Hustle

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

As if divorce wasn’t bad enough, the FBI warns the most common targets of dating scams are divorced women over 40. Women are courted online, and after weeks of intimacy, money is missing. This post contains a few post-divorce tips to protect yourself

Dirty Rotten Scoundrels

According to an Atlantic magazine article, scams are abundant, and Derek Alldred seems to have scammed at least a dozen women out of about $1 million since 2010.

He used different names and occupations, but the identities he took on always had an element of financial prestige or manly valor: decorated veteran, surgeon, air marshal, investment banker.

Con artists have long known that a uniform bolsters an illusion, and Derek was fond of dressing up in scrubs and military fatigues. He tended to look for women in their 40s or 50s, preferably divorced, preferably with a couple of kids and a dog or two.

The age of the internet, with its infinitude of strangers and swiftly evolving social mores, has also been good for con men. The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center, which tracks internet-facilitated criminal activity, received nearly 300,000 complaints in 2016.

Of those scams, more than 14,500 were for relationship fraud, a number that has more than doubled since 2011.

Divorce Tips

I’ve written about practical tips after your divorce before. Consider that once the lawyers, are gone, who is there to guide you on the many questions? There are some immediate steps to take to ensure your hard-fought interests are protected – and your financial documents reflect your new marital status.

Once your divorce is final – meaning a final judgment is entered – you should review and revise, if necessary, the following legal and estate planning documents:

  • Trusts
  • Powers of Attorney (property, healthcare, HIPAA, etc.)
  • Will
  • Life insurance policies
  • Retirement accounts

What can happen if you don’t?

One example is common. If your ex-spouse remains the beneficiary of your life insurance policy and you pass away, the proceeds will go to your ex-spouse instead your children.

The opposite can also be true. In Florida, the plain language of the documents controls. To the extent your or your former spouse claimed a right to remain as the beneficiary under a life insurance policy – as a condition of the dissolution of marriage – your rights can be waived.

The Sting

The FBI warns that in many scams, women are courted online by men who claim to be deployed in Afghanistan or tending an offshore oil rig in Qatar. After weeks or months of intimate emails, texts, and phone calls, the putative boyfriend will urgently need money to replace a broken laptop or buy a plane ticket home.

According to the Justice Department, only 15% of fraud victims report the crimes to law enforcement, largely due to shame, guilt, embarrassment, and disbelief:

You feel really crappy about yourself,” Missi told me, then slipped into a tone that sounded like the mean voice that lives inside her head: “I’m a stupid woman; I’m a dumb, dumb, dumbass.

One excellent way to dispel yourself of any con-man fantasies, however, is to spend some time with the people they’ve hurt. Their victims are negotiating ruined credit scores and calls from collection agencies.

Several were so flattened by the experience, they’ve had old medical problems flare up or have struggled to go back to work.

The Atlantic magazine article is here.

 

Divorce Auction

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

Russell Crowe sold dozens of items this past weekend at a Sotheby’s auction to help him fund his divorce from ex-wife Danielle Spencer. The auction appears to have worked better than expected.

The Art of Divorce

Crowe titled the event “The Art of Divorce,” the divorce auction took place in Sydney on his 54th birthday and featured more than 200 items, including movie memorabilia, antique treasures, artwork and a collection of instruments.

A replica Roman chariot from the same movie in which Crowe played the general-turned-gladiator Maximus, thought to be worth up to AU$10,000, was sold for AU$65,000.

Sotheby’s had estimated the sale would bring in up to AU$3.7m (more than $2.8 million in U.S. dollars), but many items sold for more than their original pricing.

Florida Property Division

In Florida, courts distribute marital assets and liabilities between the parties with the premise that the distribution should be equal unless there is a justification for an unequal distribution. Although it may seem like it, equitable distribution is not an auction.

I’ve written about various aspects of property division before, including Russell Crowe’s proposed auction when it was first announced.

Marital assets are properties acquired and debts incurred during the marriage, individually by either spouse or jointly by them.

Marital assets and liabilities also include the enhancement in value and appreciation of non-marital assets resulting either from the efforts of either party during the marriage.

Dissipation and Waste

One of the relevant factors courts look to in property division is whether one of the parties intentionally dissipated, wasted, depleted, or destroyed any of the marital assets after the filing of the petition.

Spouses can dissipate assets by giving away money irresponsibly, spending money on girlfriends, gambling losses, and drug usage. Some people would rather lose the money outright than split it with their spouses.

If the dissipation of an asset resulted from misconduct, the question is whether a spouse used marital funds for his own benefit unrelated to the marriage at a time when the marriage was undergoing an irreconcilable breakdown.

Misconduct is not mismanagement or even a simple squandering of marital assets in a manner of which the other spouse disapproves. There is no report that the Crowe auction was a waste of assets.

Instead, there has to be evidence of the spending spouse’s intentional dissipation or destruction of the asset. Where marital misconduct results in a depletion or dissipation of marital assets, it can serve as a basis for unequal division.

Alternatively, courts can look at the misconduct, and can assign to the spending spouse as part of their equitable distribution, the misconduct losses.

Battle for the Jockstrap?

Among the most popular items at the auction was the breastplate he wore in “Gladiator” when his character Maximus (spoiler alert) bites the dust. The piece sold for $125,000 while matching leather wrist cuffs scored $32,000.

Crowe also sold items from movies like “Master and Commander,” “The Silver Brumby” and “Proof,” though the Royal Navy dress blues from “Master” proved extremely popular, bringing in a $115,000 haul.

One of the more curious items was the leather jockstrap Crowe wore in the 2005 film “Cinderella Man.” The protective piece went for $7,000 to one lucky bidder.

“I put it in the collection as a piece of whimsy and a bit of a gag. Funny enough, it’s garnered a lot of attention,”.

He and Spencer wed in 2003, and news broke of their split in 2012. The divorce is just about finalized, and the ex-couple share two children.

The auction raised money for the A.C.M.F. charity, which provides free music education and instruments to disadvantaged and indigenous children and youth at risk in Sydney.

The New York Times article is here.

 

Jump Street

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

So much for The Vow. Channing Tatum and his wife came out Fighting, announcing their divorce. The appreciation of their properties and investment makes their property division quite The Dilemma – even if they don’t become Public Enemies.

This is the End

The former couple, Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan, both 37, announced their separation on Monday after almost nine years of marriage and after welcoming their daughter in 2013.

We have lovingly chosen to separate…love is a beautiful adventure that is taking us on different paths for now [who writes these? ed.].

According to People, it’s estimated that Tatum made $60 million in 2013 for movies like The Vow, 21 Jump Street, Magic Mike and G.I. Joe: Retaliation. He also launched his own vodka line during the marriage.

Property Division

I’ve written extensively about property divisions. Equitable distribution, as property division is called in Florida, requires courts to set aside each spouse’s non-marital assets and debts, and then distribute the marital assets and debts.

Marital assets and liabilities include, in part, assets acquired and liabilities incurred during the marriage, individually by either spouse or jointly by them.

Marital property then, could include Tatum’s vodka business and other valuable assets purchased during the marriage.

Step Up

Complicating matters is that Tatum was not as well-known when he married. After their marriage both of their careers grew, the stock market rebounded, and home values rocketed.

The Tatum divorce shows how stakes can rise during a marriage, and how improvements to marital – and even non-marital or premarital assets – can come into play.

Florida recently amended a law dealing with whether there is a marital portion of a nonmarital house with a mortgage paid down by marital money, and if so, how to divide the marital portion.

The issue of the appreciation of non-marital property paid with marital funds includes two components:

  1.  a portion of the enhanced value of the marital asset resulting from the contributions of the nonowner spouse and
  2.  a portion of the value of the passive appreciation of that asset that accrued during the marriage.

The new law amends our statute, and establishes a new statutory formula.

Haywire

The best way to avoid the process of an expensive property division case is to have a prenuptial agreement and a post-nuptial agreement to discuss these issues before the divorce.

Alternatively, the issues can be taken care of in a private mediation. As a last resort, they will have to fight the case in court, and have a judge decide the issues.

As a general rule, divorce litigation is something that should be avoided because things go haywire. Court battles are long, painful and expensive.

One of the other Side Effects, is that divorce also bleeds into every aspect of a person’s professional and personal life.

The People article is here.

 

Danish Divorce

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

As one of the most wired countries in the world, Denmark offers hospital records, tax returns, and divorces online. But the skyrocketing divorce rate has caused the country to limit the ease of divorce. What are drawbacks to a quick, online divorce?

Quickie Divorces

The New York Times reports that a Danish divorce can be obtained in less than a week with only a short online form and a $60 fee. But the government has decided that breaking up should be a little a harder to do.

Under new rules set to go into effect next year, couples who have children and who decide to dissolve their marriage will be required to observe a three-month “reflection period” before the divorce takes effect, during which they will be offered free counseling.

The idea is to provide protection for children, who will also receive counseling during the waiting period. (The quick divorce is still available for childless couples and in cases of abuse.)

Florida Divorce

I’ve written frequently about divorce issues, especially the differences between international and Florida divorces.  Florida, like Denmark, has its own restrictions on divorcing, even if not everything is available online.

For instance, you have to be a resident of the state of Florida for at least six months before filing. Additionally, you must file a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage with the circuit court and the Respondent files an Answer and/or counter petition.

A final judgment ending the marriage may not be entered until at least 20 days after the date the Petition was filed, unless the court finds that an injustice would result from this delay.

This is Your Danish Divorce

The current Danish laws give divorcing parents only a few days to decide on arrangements for their children online, increasing the potential for conflict. Denmark wants to give parents space and not make decisions right away.

The changes are a rare step back in a country that has moved aggressively to move official interactions online.

More than 90% of Danes between 16 and 89 can use a government-issued digital ID to gain access to personal records or to communicate with the authorities.

The system is often efficient: 1.3 million people logged on to see their annual tax return within 24 hours of release this month. But the push to digitalize Denmark may have gone too far and doesn’t work in divorce and death.

Digital death certificates, required in Denmark since 2007, lead to the immediate cancellation of passports, driver’s licenses and digital IDs to prevent fraud.

Kirsten Margrethe Kristensen was mistakenly declared dead by a doctor this month. “Making mistakes is human,” she told DR, the national broadcaster. “It’s more that one, just by a click, is out of the system and gone.”

The quick divorce presents a similar problem, some officials said — particularly when children are involved.

Soren Sander, a psychologist who has studied the effects of divorce, said that children and adults alike suffer psychologically and physically from a breakup:

“There are indications that with intervention their well-being increases.”

That’s not to say that divorces in Denmark are leaving the internet behind: While some counseling during the three-month reflection period takes place face to face, a mandatory course on the typical challenges of a divorce is available online and through an app.

The New York Times article is here.

 

Turkish Delight

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

Another fault-based divorce ruling comes from Turkey’s Directorate of Religious Affairs, which issued a fatwa stating that if a man refers to his wife as either “mother” or “sister,” their marriage will be deemed divorced. What is no-fault divorce?

A Real Turkey

According to Turkey’s Hurriyet newspaper, if a man tells his wife that he sees her as a mother or sister, the man will be considered divorced from his wife.

However, if they have not divorced before, they may come together with a new marriage,” it said.

If a man says those things or other phrases like “I divorce you”, “You are not my wife”, “Be free”, “Go off”, or “Go to your father’s house” to his wife with the intention to divorce, the divorce has taken place in terms of Islam, even if it is sent by SMS or by e-mail.

Previously, the Diyanet, the Turkish Religious Affairs Directorate, had issued a fatwa on divorce, stating that couples may get divorced via telephone call, fax, letter, text message or internet.

Turkey’s preeminent religious authority has a long track record of issuing other interesting fatwas. For example, in November, the Diyanet declared the digital currency bitcoin “inappropriate at this moment in time.”

Then it issued a fatwa on hair dye for men, followed by a prohibition on purchasing national lottery tickets. Several days later, it warned against “immoral music.”

Florida No Fault Divorce

I’ve written about no fault divorces before. Historically in Florida, in order to obtain a divorce in Florida, one spouse had to prove the existence of legal grounds such as adultery.

Proving fault often required additional expenses on behalf of the aggrieved party, only serving to make the divorce process more expensive and cumbersome than it already was.

In the years leading up to the enactment of “no-fault” divorce, courts often granted divorces on bases that were easier to prove, the most common being “mental cruelty.”

Over time, the “no-fault” movement expanded to other states, although interestingly it only reached the typically progressive state of New York in 2010.

The Triple Talaq Divorce

Islamic countries have been convulsing lately with the divorce concept of “triple talaq.” Turkey’s Diyanet issued a similar fatwa. According to Hurriyet:

Divorcing your spouse by saying ‘talaq’ three times via phone call, letter, SMS, internet and fax are as valid as saying it to their face. However, in this situation, the husband should not deny the divorce.

If a woman is divorced through written methods such as a text message or letter, she should ensure that the message was sent by her husband.”

The religious body, Diyanet, has no power under Turkish law to issue a divorce. Civil courts grant separations under the 1926 Turkish civil code law. However, Turkey has become increasingly religious over the past several years.

The institution serves the Prime Minister’s office, is responsible for the appointments of personnel at mosques, drafts centralized sermons read at all mosques, and issues fatwas.

Critics argue that the Diyanet is against the impartiality required of a secular state, and that it promotes only one understanding of Islam in Turkey and abroad.

The Hurriyet article is here.

 

The Engagement Ring

Posted by Ron Kauffman on

If the luck of the Irish holds, your engagement diamond may be yours forever. Diamonds, given to you after someone asks the question: “will you marry me?” with a “yes” to follow, are a contract. This is why so many of them end up in court property division cases.

The Engagement Ring Tradition

Until the 1930s, a woman jilted by her fiancé could sue for financial compensation for “damage” to her reputation under what was known as the “Breach of Promise to Marry” action.

As courts began to abolish such actions, diamond ring sales rose in response to a need for a symbol of financial commitment from the groom.

I’ve written about engagement rings before. Florida abolished the appropriately termed “heart balm statutes”. Heart balm statutes were laws allowing couples to sue each other to recover money for the alienation of affections and breaches of contract to marry.

As one court poetically noted:

[A] gift given by a man to a woman on condition that she embark on the sea of matrimony with him is no different from a gift based on the condition that the donee sail on any other sea. If, after receiving the provisional gift, the donee refuses to leave the harbor – if the anchor of contractual performance sticks in the sands of irresolution and procrastination – the gift must be restored to the donor. A fortiori would this be true when the donee not only refuses to sail with the donor, but, on the contrary, walks up the gangplank of another ship arm in arm with the donor’s rival?

Engagement Rings in Court

After an engagement ring is given, and if the couple doesn’t marry, in New York the law deems a broken engagement as no one’s fault. Accordingly, the ring should be given back to the giver, with few exceptions. Most states have adopted that approach.

This is true in Florida. Lawsuits to recover an engagement ring by disappointed donors usually are resolved by courts looking to see if the engagement was terminated by the donee or by mutual consent of the parties.

The rationale is that rings are given on the implied condition that a marriage ensue.

Once a marriage proposal is extended and accepted — once the promise is made — no matter what day of the year, that ring is no longer considered a gift. It’s a contract to enter into marriage.

Most states embraced the no-fault rule after the 1997 case of Heiman v. Parrish. There, the Kansas Supreme Court decided that no matter who broke the engagement, the ring should be given back to the giver if the parties don’t marry.

“Ordinarily, the ring should be returned to the donor, regardless of fault,” the court found.

But Montana hasn’t followed the rule. Montana classifies the ring as an unconditional gift. The recipient keeps it. California and Texas take a middle-of-the road approach: the recipient of the ring is expected to return it, unless the giver called off the engagement.

The general rule in Florida is that an engagement ring given before the marriage, becomes a non-marital gift if the marriage is completed. If so, the ring becomes the non-marital property of the Wife.

If the engagement ring is viewed by the court as a non-marital asset, it is not subject to equitable distribution in divorce proceedings, and the spouse keeps it as their own.

The New York Times article is here.