Tag: divorce and drugs

Marriage, Pot, and Divorce

Marriage, pot, and divorce have become issues family courts have been dealing with as marijuana laws change across the country. But this post discusses something else entirely, the marriage of a woman to an actual clay pot.

Pot Divorce

Kumbha Vivah

In the New York Times, a Hindu writer living in Hong Kong writes about her big wedding day . . . to a clay pot.

“From here on, it’s me and Mr. Pot. Mr. Pot and I. He’s curvaceous. I’m just nervous.”

In India, fate or destiny is not just inescapable, but a rational scapegoat for the bad times and a benevolent provider for the good times. In every Indian city, fortune tellers set up shop, there are universities dedicated to astrological understanding, and TV shows of gurus fielding viewers’ burning questions about the stars.

When a boy or girl is facing the misfortune of “manglik dosha” in their horoscope, one of the only spiritual solutions is Kumbh Vivah – the process of marrying a ceramic pot to remove any bad karma. Kumbh Vivah is a real solution for any aspiring young manglik wishing to marry.

According to one New York Times writer’s astrological chart, Mars occupied her house for love and marriage. And that, in Vedic astrology, made her “manglik,” or Mars cursed! Problem was, she fell in love with a non-manglik, and her parents refused to let her marry him. There was one imperfect solution:

kumbh vivah: marry a ceramic pot instead.

Florida, Pot, and Divorce

Marriage, pot, and divorce frequently come up in Florida too, but usually not the ceramic variety. I have written about the use of marijuana and how it can impact your custody case. No data exist to show how often marijuana use comes up in custody disputes, or how often child welfare workers intervene in homes where marijuana is used.

But in dozens of interviews, the consensus is clear: marijuana’s growing acceptance is complicating the task of determining when kids are in danger.

Medical marijuana implementation plans are being introduced and discussed in legislatures around the country. Florida’s Amendment 2 expanded the previously limited Florida medical marijuana law.

Florida has not legalized recreational marijuana. Many states and the District of Columbia currently have laws broadly legalizing marijuana in some form. Seven states and the District of Columbia have adopted the most expansive laws legalizing marijuana for recreational use.

Most recently, California passed a measure in legalizing recreational marijuana use the way Colorado considers marijuana use legal. Marijuana is still listed as a Schedule I controlled substance, like heroin, under federal law.

Whether you are a parent with a medical marijuana prescription, the analysis of whether your custody case can be impacted by smoking pot will depend on the facts and circumstances of your case. There is no hard and fast rule for the use of medical marijuana by parents involved in a custody dispute.

A Match Made in a Kiln

If a person is advised to perform a Kumbha Vivah wedding, they are taught the ceremony is like a real wedding, but there is no need to call friends and guests. This is typically a private and closed marriage ceremony which the bride (or vase) is going to end soon.

They are not very expensive either, which is helpful as wedding costs have skyrocketed. The approximate cost of a Kumbha Vivah is 7000 Indian Rupees, about $93. But the mantras and procedures are similar to a real marriage.

In Bali, the New York Times writer held Mr. Pot in her hands, and when the prayers ended, stood up together, and walked outside the temple to a quiet, deserted space.

And then I smashed my new husband into the ground, shattering him into tiny pieces!

The thinking is that the pot represents a husband who would be the reason why things are destined to go wrong. Divorce, by smashing the clay pot, symbolizes the end of that ill-fated marriage. Ostensibly, the curse is lifted and the manglik can marry the man they want.

Eight months later, she married her real husband under the blue skies of Bali, surrounded by gleaming family and friends. They walked around a fire, exchanged vows and danced all night. Most important, the parents delightfully embraced her husband.

She has been happily married for four years. Make of that what you wish.

The New York Times article is here.

*Photo credit Alicia Nijdam – Flickr: Gaurav and Anu’s wedding, CC BY 2.0